Wednesday, April 6, 2016

Come To The Well

 I was driving this past weekend when this song came on a cd (yes, a van is super old school.  I even have a tape deck!!!!) I was listening to.

Springtime always brings me such sweet memories of when I met my husband. 

It was about a month before Mother's Day 18 years ago when I began to feel God pull at my heart.  A yearning back to Him.  A Sunday in April, I found myself sitting in a little white church with my grandmother.  And it was just peaceful.  God was drawing me back.  I spent years trying to do it on my own.  I spent years being good, believing it would be enough.

Then God did something and had the path of a Pastor's kid cross with this girl yearning for something more.  It was Mother's Day which always falls on a Sunday.  And he was a PK.  I could tell right away that there was something different about him.  It drew me in.  We talked about weighty subjects that first day we met.  I sat and listened as he talked about selfless love.  He talked about unborn babies and how they had the right to life.  And he talked about how Jesus has called us to love each other when loving was hard.  He talked about Jesus. 

I was walking to the well.  And this PK was telling me about this drink that...
 "all who thirst will thirst no more,
And all who search will find what their souls long for,
The world will try, but it can never fill,
So leave it all behind, and come to the well."

 It was a few months later when I let my heart rest in His hands.  I love the second part of the chorus of "The Well".  It says, 
"So bring me your heart
No matter how broken,
Just come as you are,
When your last prayer is spoken,
Just rest in my arms a while,
You'll feel the change my child,
When you come to the well"

18 years ago this summer I laid down my own desires and started following His.  I went to the Well.   I love the sweet reminder that spring brings.  Something about dead things coming alive.  The ground being cultivated for the harvest.  Seeds being planted.  Water coming from the Well.  

And these days, I find myself sitting at the Well more often.  Longing for it more.  Bringing others with me to sit at the Well.  Ah, yes.  As years pass by as I journey in my walk with Him on this side of Heaven, I find myself yearning for more of Him.  

It's so good.  He is so good.  To sit in His presence, letting His love wash over me.  His love for His children, how He seeks after us.  How He wants to know the desires of our hearts.  He is so good.  So so so good.

Friday, January 22, 2016

Don't Put God in a Box!

I've been teaching in Children's Church about praying big prayers, and expecting big answers from God.  I want this stuff to be real to our kiddos NOW, in their youth.  God hears their prayers just as much as any adult. 

Well, it has also challenged me to pray big prayers.  Ones that can seem not safe and maybe a little scary.  And this morning as I watch God answer a big prayer that left me shaking and trembling wondering that maybe I had out did myself... It caused my mind to start rolling about how I got so terrified to pray these big prayers. 

For years I felt boxed, incredibly uncomfortable in the quest of being comfortable.  Always feeling like there was something more than a list of rules and checklists (somewhat self imposed) that I had to follow. If I do this, or follow this, or dress like this then maybe I'll fit in.  I imagine I felt little bit of what the Israelite's felt under The Law. 

I had always felt like I had to set up the parameters for God's box in my life.  I could make the rules, keep Him fairly contained so I could live happily.  And then I could invite Him in to my box. I could keep it comfortable and controlled.  I felt like I was on a hamster wheel.  Never succeeding, yet never failing... so I kept on running.

Then something happened.  And I knew I had no box for God.  God began to tear down the box.  The same idea as Peter getting out of the boat and walking on water.  If I never got out of my box (or for Peter, the boat) then I would never know all that God has for me.  And I want all that He has for me.  For the last couple of years God has been gently asking me to let Him lead, even if it makes me uncomfortable.  Giving more and more control over to Him.  Letting Him set the parameters. 

Walking under the umbrella of grace rather than in the law.  With God not in a box, but instead gently leading His children.  God is big.  Oh so big, and His grace covers.