Friday, May 10, 2013

Do you like it? Homeschooling?

I was asked recently if I liked homeschooling.

My reply?  I hate it.

There it is, all out there in the honest truth.  I hate the constant correction.  I always feel like I am yelling... "Finish that page!" "Hey! Why are you up from the table again?" "How many times have I asked you to finish that assignment???"

I want blissfully happiness in all our days.  I want my kiddos to show up to school willing and ready to work hard.  I read these blogs of totally blissful homeschooling momma's in their perfect well maintained/furnished houses with their children perfectly dressed and work so hard that their work is completed by lunch.  Bliss.  Right??? 

This week was going really well and then went down hill.  I am not sure what happened, and it wasn't the kiddos.  It was me.  I felt my feet slip into this sinking hole of despair, the kind that drives you to bed and steals every ounce of energy so getting out again isn't an option.  The same day, our school books for next year were delivered and I looked at the with tears in my eyes.  I just couldn't imagine doing this again.  It has been an exhausting, emotional year of homeschooling. 

Even though homeschooling is utterly exhausting for me, I do believe that this is what God has called us to do for our family.  This year has been a whole lot of lessons from the Lord for me.  I know I will look back and say, "Wow, I am so thankful for that year of correction."  But right now?  It hurts like...a lot.

There is joy in obedience.  And it is my prayer that all the hard work now will pay off in the long run!  I really do love being their cheerleader!

1 comment:

Sues said...

I treasure your honesty. It is absolutely priceless!!! Praying for sustaining grace for you that only God can provide, and in the meantime, you know you have my support! I'll send you hugs for any vent you need to release!!!