Well I'm glad you asked.
Or not. Since it puts me in the 'other' corner, the one that gets funky stares when I grocery shop with 3 kids at 1pm when it is clearly still school hours.
Or when my kids say they are homeschooled the person then looks at me with the "Oh those POOR kids" look.
And the world tells me I am failing them, and part of me wants to run and enroll them back in public school.
Or the look I get because "What about 'you' time?"
I will totally admit that I get caught up in it all...and sometimes I even do feel guilty about homeschooling. I voiced it to my Dad last night as we watched the kiddos play on the playground. The guilt about making sure that they get enough socialization with other children, you know so they aren't 'those poor kids'. When school started I mourned the loss of my 'me time' as I read the status' on facebook of Mommies sending their kids off. I'll admit that a very small part of me missed the excitement of it. Do I need to even mention that my reffing skills have greatly improved since the children are home all day, together. Together, all day. Right? Yea.
All that stuff? Is NOTHING in comparison to the bond that I see growing between me and then between each other. As we work together through lessons and as they work together through struggles, the growth is overwhelming. I told Sam this weekend that I was just overwhelmed with homeschooling. He got this look of terror on his face...overwhelmed? I had to explain that my overwhelming feelings were extremely positive. It was (IS!) more of an emotional overwhelming than being overwhelmed by tasks that need to be completed. Watching them grow and develop, being an active part in their learning is amazing. There is a door that has been opened in our communication together that I/we didn't experience at all last year. The time I actually spend with the kids, quality time, is in abundance. We sit and read together and during nap time they love it when I make the rounds and lay with each one of them in each of their beds talking and reading individually with them. The conversations we have together are so touching. They feel more open to verbalize their fears with me and the amount of affection they are showing to me and each other can be, at times, over the top! So sweet!! It just feels right.
So why? It just feels right. There is so much more than just schooling in our day. There is a day filled with love with Christ at the center.
Yes, melodramatic? Probably, I hope so. I wasN'T an emotional person but God has been working in my heart. To soften me, to make me a more loving and forgiving person. So, here I am...embracing the melodramatic!
1 comment:
<3
Simply beautiful.
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